73+ Hippo Puns Every Animal Lover Will Enjoy 🦛💛

Get ready to laugh so hard you might just make a splash! Welcome to the ultimate collection of hippo wordplay, where the jokes are big, wet, and impossible to ignore.

Whether you’re a kid with a silly streak or an adult who appreciates a good groan-worthy pun, you’re in the right watering hole.

We’ve wallowed in the mud of creativity to bring you over 100 of the freshest, funniest, and most family-friendly hippo puns to brighten your day.

Don’t worry, they’re all clean enough to share at the dinner table (just maybe not while drinking water). Let’s dive in!

The Heavyweight Champions of Wordplay

When it comes to puns, hippos are the undisputed heavyweight champions. Their sheer size gives us so much material to work with! These jokes are big, bold, and guaranteed to make a significant impact.

1. I wanted to tell you a hippo joke, but it’s a little too big to fit in the conversation.
2. What do you call a hippo who wins a sumo match? The champ-potamus.
3. I tried to write a song about hippos, but it turned into a heavy metal track.
4. Never get into an argument with a hippo. They always have to have the last, massive word.
5. My pet hippo started a fitness blog. He calls it “The Hip-to-be-Fit-potamus.”
6. Did you hear about the hippo fortune teller? She had a huge premonition.
7. Why did the hippo sit on the clock? He wanted to be on hippo time.
8. What’s a hippo’s favorite type of story? One with a lot of gravity.
9. The hippo comedian wasn’t very funny. His jokes just didn’t carry much weight.
10. I asked the hippo if he was free for lunch. He said, “No, I have a lot on my plate.”
11. Why don’t hippos make good secret agents? They’re terrible at keeping a low profile.
12. That hippo is a great public speaker. He really knows how to command a room.
13. The hippo’s new business is doing well. I guess you could say it’s scaling up.
14. What’s a hippo’s least favorite game? Hide and Seek.
15. The hippo magician’s greatest trick was making his appetite disappear.

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Hungry, Hungry Hippo Puns

Everyone knows hippos have legendary appetites. They spend most of their time eating, which gives us a mouthful of hilarious material. These puns are all about food, hunger, and the simple joy of a good meal (or ten).

1. What did the hippo say to the waiter? “I’ll have everything on the menu, and then the menu.”
2. Why did the hippo get kicked out of the all-you-can-eat buffet? He was too much of a river hog.
3. A hippo’s favorite part of the newspaper is the “Chews”-day food section.
4. I opened a bakery for hippos. We specialize in whole river-loaf bread.
5. The hippo’s diet isn’t going well. He’s still weighing his options.
6. What’s a hippo’s favorite snack? Guaca-mole (get it? they love to wallow in mud!).
7. Never play cards with a hippo. He’s a known cheetah… I mean, cheater. He just eats the cards.
8. Why was the hippo a great food critic? He always gave well-rounded reviews.
9. The hippo at the salad bar was just going through the motions… very, very slowly.
10. What do you call a hippo who loves Italian food? A hippo-lognese.
11. How does a hippo like his steak? Still moo-ving. Just kidding, he likes it rare.
12. The hippo’s favorite exercise is the sit-up. He sits up, sees food, and eats it.
13. I told my hippo friend a joke about a burger. He said, “I don’t get it, but I’ll have a bite anyway.”
14. The hippo’s cooking show is called “Hippo-pot-omas-ter.”
15. What’s a hippo’s favorite day of the week? Chewsday, obviously!

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Splash-Tastic Water & River Puns

Hippos love the water, and we love making a splash with aquatic puns! These jokes are all about rivers, baths, and making a wet-and-wild impression. Get ready to get soaked with laughter.

1. What did one hippo say to the other in the river? “It’s great to sea you!“
2. Hippos don’t use public pools because they don’t like sharing their current events.
3. The hippo’ life philosophy? “Go with the flow… and block the flow for everyone else.”
4. Why did the hippo bring a towel to the river? In case he made a big splash.
5. What’s a hippo’s favorite type of music? Hip-hop. (Okay, that one was low-hanging fruit, but we had to!).
6. The hippo opened a spa. He calls it “The Rivaah Club.”
7. Why was the hippo such a good swimmer? He had a natural buoyant personality.
8. What do you call a hippo who’s a great surfer? Dude-potamus.
9. Never tell a hippo a secret in the water. It always comes out in the wash.
10. The young hippo was nervous about jumping in. His mom said, “Don’t worry, it’s just a phase you’re going through.”
11. The hippo poet wrote an ode to his favorite place. It was called “An Ode to the Watering Hole.”
12. Why did the hippo get a ticket on the river? For exceeding the wake limit.
13. The hippo’s favorite movie genre? Water-based documentaries.
14. What’s a hippo’s favorite board game? “Sorry!” especially when they block your path.
15. How do hippos send messages? River mail.

Mud-Wallowin’ Good Jokes

If hippos aren’t in the water, they’re probably rolling around in some glorious, squishy mud. It’s their skincare routine, sunscreen, and favorite hobby all in one. These puns are a little dirty (in the cleanest way possible).

1. Why did the hippo get a job at the skincare clinic? He was an expert in mud-therapy.
2. What do you call a hippo who loves gardening? A muddy paw-thumb.
3. The hippo’s favorite type of vacation? A mud-and-breakfast.
4. I started a mud-wrestling league for hippos. It’s a sloppy success.
5. Why was the hippo so good at pottery? He was a natural at getting his hands dirty.
6. The hippo’s band is called “Muddy Waters.” (A classic!).
7. What’s a hippo’s favorite beauty treatment? A mud-facial, of course.
8. The lazy hippo just wanted to loaf around in the loam.
9. Why don’t hippos get dirty? Because they always start that way!
10. The hippo architect designed a new house made entirely of mud. He called it “Adobe Acres.”
11. What did the clean hippo say to the muddy hippo? “You look grounded.”
12. The hippo’s favorite chocolate dessert? Mud pie, naturally.
13. Why did the hippo cross the road? To get to the muddy side.
14. The hippo artist only painted with one color: rich, brown mud.
15. A hippo’s idea of a perfect day ends with “all mucked out.”

Hippo Family & Baby Hippo Cuteness

Baby hippos (called calves) are surprisingly adorable, and their family dynamics are ripe for pun-ishment. These jokes focus on the lighter, cuter side of hippo life. Get ready for some “aww”-inspiring wordplay.

1. What do you call a baby hippo who tells jokes? A little pun-potamus.
2. The mommy hippo told her calf a bedtime story. It was a real yawn-er… of the river.
3. Why did the baby hippo bring a ladder to school? He wanted to go to high-potamus.
4. What’s a baby hippo’s favorite lullaby? “Rock-a-bye Hippo.”
5. The father hippo was so proud. He said, “That’s my calf!”
6. How do hippo parents discipline their kids? They give them a time-out in a very small puddle.
7. What did the baby hippo get on his test? A river-ly good grade.
8. The teenage hippo was going through a phase. He just wanted to make waves.
9. Why was the hippo family always calm? They knew how to keep things on an even keel.
10. What do you call a group of hippo toddlers? A pod of peanuts.
11. The hippo grandparents loved to tell stories about “the good old streams.”
12. The baby hippo’s first word was “wallow.”
13. Why did the hippo calf join the choir? He had great river-beration.
14. The hippo family reunion was huge. It was a relative-ly massive gathering.
15. What’s a hippo dad’s favorite thing to say? “I’m not sleeping, I’m just resting my eyes… in the water.”

“Hip” & Modern Hippo Puns

Let’s bring our chunky friends into the 21st century! These puns imagine hippos with social media, modern jobs, and contemporary problems. Because even a prehistoric-looking animal can be hip.

1. The hippo started a TikTok channel about relaxing in water. He went viral.
2. What’s a hippo’s favorite app? Insta-graham (for posting pics of tasty reeds).
3. The hippo tried online dating. His profile said, “Looking for someone to share my watering hole with.”
4. Why did the hippo get a smartwatch? To track his steps-per-hour… which is usually two.
5. The hippo streamer’s channel was just 12 hours of him floating peacefully.
6. The hippo’s startup failed. He tried to sell mud-based cloud storage.
7. What’s a hippo’s Wi-Fi password? MuddyWater123.
8. The hippo got a job in IT. He’s the server that never goes down.
9. The hippo influencer’s brand is all about #ChonkLife.
10. Why did the hippo get a gym membership? For the pool, obviously.
11. The hippo’s podcast is called “Deep Dives with Dave the Hippo.” It’s very shallow.
12. What’s a hippo’s favorite emoji? The hippo emoji, duh! 🦛
13. The hippo tried to invent a new ride-sharing app called “Hippo.” It was too slow.
14. The hippo’s LinkedIn headline: “Senior Aquatic Grass Consumption Analyst.”
15. Why was the hippo bad at video games? He kept pressing the wrong mammal.

Animal Kingdom Crossover Puns

Hippos don’t live in a vacuum (though they might like to). They share the savannah and river with other amazing creatures. These jokes imagine the hilarious interactions between hippos and their animal neighbors.

1. What did the hippo say to the impatient crocodile? “Don’t snap at me!“
2. The zebra asked the hippo for racing tips. The hippo said, “Just take it slow and steady.“
3. Why did the bird land on the hippo? He heard it was a stable platform.
4. The monkey called the hippo lazy. The hippo replied, “I’m not lazy, I’m energy efficient.“
5. What do you get when you cross a hippo with a detective? Sherlock Gnomes… wait, that’s not right.
6. The fish asked the hippo for a ride upstream. The hippo said, “Hop on, it’s a slow boat.“
7. The lion challenged the hippo. The hippo just yawned and sank lower in the water.
8. What did the flea say to the hippo? “You’re my biggest supporter!“
9. The giraffe and hippo started a business. It was a high-and-low venture.
10. Why are hippos and turtles good friends? They share the same life pace.
11. The parrot sat on the hippo all day. He was a hippo-tern.
12. The antelope was always nervous around hippos. He found them unusually opaque.
13. What do you call a hippo who loves birds? An ornithologist-potamus. (See? We snuck in another reference to our favorite feathery friends. Good bird puns often fly into other animal jokes!).
14. The bee buzzed around the hippo. The hippo didn’t care. He was bee-yond irritation.
15. The meerkat asked the hippo to be a lookout. The hippo said, “My view is always ground-level.“

The Groan-Worthy Grand Finale

You’ve made it! You’ve weathered the river of puns and survived the mudslide of wordplay. But we saved some of the silliest, most groan-inducing hippo puns for last. Consider this your final, glorious splash into the deep end of hippo humor.

1. I read a book about hippos. It was riveting.
2. What’s a hippo’s favorite nation? Hippo-stan.
3. The hippo joined the army. He was in the infantry… get it? Infant-ry? No? Okay.
4. Why did the hippo go to the bank? To check his river-sion account.
5. The hippo’s favorite Shakespeare play? “A Midsummer Night’s Stream.”
6. What do you call a hippo who’s a knight? Sir Loin of the Water.
7. The hippo quit his job at the glue factory. He said, “I’m stuck in a rut.“
8. Why was the hippo a bad student? He always floated through class.
9. The hippo’s favorite geometric shape? An oblong, because it’s just like him.
10. What’s a hippo’s favorite kind of investment? Water-bonds.
11. The hippo wrote a memoir. It was mostly about current events.
12. Why did the hippo become a comedian? He had great pool material.
13. The hippo’s favorite exercise machine? The water treadmill.
14. What’s a hippo’s favorite part of a song? The bridge, so he can stand under it.
15. And finally, what did we learn today? That hippo puns never get old, they just get… waterlogged.

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Conclusion

And there you have it—a veritable flood of hippo hilarity! We hope these puns made you smile, chuckle, or at least let out a solid, appreciative groan. Remember, a day with a bad pun is still better than a day with no pun at all. So, be a dear and share this article with a friend who needs a laugh. After all, laughter is contagious… kind of like a hippo’s yawn, but much more pleasant. Now go forth and spread the joy, you magnificent river of wit!

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Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Q: Are these hippo puns appropriate for kids?
A: Absolutely! We’ve carefully crafted every joke to be 100% family-friendly, clean, and suitable for all ages. No muddy humor here!

Q: How can I come up with my own animal puns?
A: Start with the animal’s key traits (size, habitat, diet, sound) and play with homophones and related words. For example, with bird puns, you’d think about flying, feathers, nests, and tweets!

Q: Why are puns considered such a “dad” humor style?
A: Puns are accessible, clever, and often induce groans—a perfect combo for a dad aiming to be both funny and slightly embarrassing. But everyone can enjoy them!

Q: Where can I find more puns like these?
A: Right here! Bookmark our site for regular deliveries of punny content across all species, from hippo puns to elephant jokes and everything in between.